The duties of a tea boy (or girl*) may include activities as diverse as cleaning the hostess' bathroom before a party to baking brownies to be served at the tea.  Servers are there for the pleasure of the ladies. Their wants and needs are not of importance. Their duty is to serve. The service required is not for them to choose. The whole point is that the ladies are pleased.

Tea parties are not play parties. It may be that a server will be used to demonstrate a toy or a technique that is being discussed, but the function of the teaservers is to wait on the ladies as unobtrusively as possible. Servers are NOT there to be noticed.  A server who initiates a conversation with a lady, who draws attention to himself, or who fails to perform his service neatly, quietly and skillfully, will not be used again.  If a server expects to be used sexually, or to be spanked or otherwise played with, then he/she will not make a good teaserver.  This is not your purpose.  Teaservers are service oriented. A teaserver is there to make the afternoon as carefree and pleasant for the ladies as possible. You need to realize that this is a TEA party. The ladies will drink tea and eat sandwiches and discuss things. They are NOT going to play with you.  You are ONLY there to serve.

A teaserver sets up and serves tea, cleans up after the party, and departs quietly.  Serving attire consists of a neatly cleaned and cared for birthday suit and a black bow tie.  The server may speak only to the serving mistress or to the hostess unless answering a direct question, or if necessary to ascertain the wishes of a lady he is serving.  The serving mistress is aware of any limits, time constraints, etc. involving each server at the party, and will look out for the welfare of the servers. 

A server with too many limits and constraints as regards serving will not be accepted for training.  It is necessary for servers to go through a training course before serving at a tea.  No exceptions.  The training is quite complete and takes the entire day.**  If you won't be able to do this, please don't apply. All training is done at Lady Cynthia's house in  Hayward, or possibly at the house of one of the Ladies in San Jose.***  We feel that training is necessary, and that it also gives the servers a good idea of what will be expected of them at the party.  Teaservers are expected to donate $35 each for the day of training.   This is to cover the cost of the training materials and a sandwich lunch for the servers.  Other than that, servers are only expected to provide their own bow ties.  Any shop that sells or rents formal attire can supply you with a black bow tie.

It is allowed and encouraged if the servers would like to bring some dainty that they have prepared with their own hands to serve to the ladies at a tea party.  It is also acceptable to bring flowers or some small token as a gift to the hostess. Gifts are NOT however, mandatory.  Good manners, skill, and forethought is one way to get noticed by the hostess and other ladies.  We do not expect the servers to contribute to the cost of the teas.  Your willing service is your contribution. 

At this time, sissy maids are allowed only by permission of the lady hostessing the tea.  Please don't whine about this.   We do not allow deviation from the attire stated above unless the hostess who is having the tea gives permission.  The training requirements are still the same.  

*Recently, the ladies voted to allow submissive women to serve at SOME of the teas. Most teas will still be served by men, only.

** We have recently changed the training classes to reflect the costs of putting them on.  Servers are now required to pay $35 for training.  If you miss the class, and do not call at least two days ahead of time, you are still required to pay the $35.  This is because it is increasingly difficult for Domina and Lady Cynthia to continue bearing the cost personally for this.

***Private training is available ONLY if you wish to pay for it. Domina and Lady Cynthia charge $1000 for a private day long tea training course.  Please remember that these ladies do training as volunteer work for the Society.  If you need a special training day, they will be giving up their own free time, which is valuable, so it is not unreasonable for them to charge for this.

If you are owned, your Mistress MUST give written or oral permission for you to take the training and serve at the teas.

If it should happen that a Mistress desires to speak to you, the training Mistress will arrange for the two of you to speak after your duties are completed, or during a break when you are not otherwise needed.  If you are interested in meeting a particular Mistress, you may tell the training Mistress who will convey your request for a conversation to the Mistress in question.  If the lady in question is interested, and ONLY then, the training Mistress will set up an opportunity for you to speak with the Mistress.  Please bear in mind that meeting someone at one of these parties is not the primary function.  Many of the ladies are not of the proper orientation for seeking a male submissive.  Many are already suited.  If meeting a Mistress is your only goal, please do NOT apply.  It has happened that a lady seeks further contact with a server she has met at a tea, but it is by no means certain that this is going to happen.  You may keep in mind that most people tend to enter relationships with people whom they know.

I've gotten a few emails to the effect that I'm asking too much since I expect you to write essays for heaven's sake. Well, if you can't give me a paragraph (not a sentence) or so on why you want to be a teaserver, and why you would be a good teaserver, then you're likely to be a problem to train, too. The application was designed to make it easy for me to find specific information. If you can't provide the info on the form, DON'T APPLY.  You must answer EVERY question.  If you can't answer, you must state why you can't answer.  This is not brain surgery.  You can do it.

Please do not whine to me that you cannot cut and paste, you don't know how, your computer does not allow you to do so, etc. If you cannot manage to answer the questions asked in the format I'm using here, please don't bother me. Think of this as a test of your resourcefulness. Domina has directions on how to cut and paste on her prodomme site. They can be found, HERE. Also, if you are looking for a mistress and want to skip the program, please don't send me email. I am not the local clearinghouse for dommes. I've been nice about answering it, so far, but I can't help you. Most of the ladies who ARE looking for subs, want a relationship. Married men are bad risks for relationships. I have a relationship, and I'm not the person who keeps track of who is looking for a male sub in the group.

It is possible to find a partner in this group.  Lady Cynthia has just married YoYo last year.  They met at a tea server training class.   It does sometimes happen, but it happens by OUR rules.  We are not going to do email introductions.  If you want to meet someone, then you are going to have to make the effort to do so.

Those of you looking for prodommes, email training, phone domination, etc. would be better off looking for the prodommes who supply these services. There are plenty on the internet who do. We are looking for submissive men to serve us tea in real life. Otherwise, we are not going to be interested in you. I am no longer bothering to answer letters asking for these services.  Although we do have members who are prodommes, we are not going to forward your email to them.  We feel that you can find a prodomme if you look.  (Try Prodomme.com) In this context, all ladies are considered to be ladies who are only interested in tea.  Please quit bothering me for referrals.  The lady members who are prodommes often have links to their websites.  So you may also look on the list of the Ladies of the Society.

For those who write to me objecting to our insistence on verifiable references. You may be surprised to discover that we are just as afraid of outing as you are. However, many of us have had friends hurt, raped, beaten, etc. by people they didn't get references from, and later had no way to identify the assailant. We just plain won't meet you if we don't know who you are. Got it? We're willing to give you references, too. So YOU can feel safe.  But this is why references are required.

For those of you with specific questions, write to Lady Strega and ask.  I will tell you right now, however, that questions about toilet training, spanking, etc. are just going to upset her, and make sure she will not approve you to be a tea server.  The duties are EXACTLY as set forth here.  We are not going to play with you, punish you, or have sex with you.  Your fetishes are not of interest, nor do we want to hear how often you have wanked to our site.  Please don't send any of us pictures of yourself, especially nude photos or photos of your penis.  WE DON'T CARE.  If you send photos like that, you will be turned down and BANNED.   This Society is for the benefit of the ladies.  We hope you are having a good time, but we are not going to change our procedures to enable you to do so.

We have had several wonderful gentlemen join us as servers.    One worthy of mention is a poet, and another offers wonderful hand massages.  A young man who found us just after he got involved with the scene now assists us in teaching our training classes.  He's also the person used as the head tea server at Sedusa's Sanctuary at the Citadel in San Francisco.  All of our regular servers are wonderful people.

Gentlemen, if you don't want to fill this out, then don't.  Incomplete submissions are deleted.  If you can't or won't give us the necessary information, then we don't want you.

Name:
(at least a real first name. For the safety of the ladies in the society, you may be required to furnish identification that can be verified at some future date, but for now, a first name will suffice.)